:(

Its been about 3 weeks now since this has happened but I wanted to update everyone with what was going on. For those of you who see me regularly you might notice that I am not showing. Not even in the slightest. About three weeks ago I saw my ob for a regular office visit. She did an ultrasound and we found that the baby had developed cystic hygroma. I'm not sure where it was exactly but he had a cyst somewhere on his body, had hemoraged and had no heartbeat. Instead of waiting a couple weeks for my body pass it on its own, we decided to have a DNC done so they could do some genetic testing on the fetus. The results showed that it was a normal boy and this was just a random fluke.

As you can imagine, this came as quite a shock and has been pretty devestating. The good news is that Angie and Nate could try again but to tell you the truth I'm not sure I can go through all of it again. Its a whole lot to go through just to be disapointed for a third time. I'm tired of all the shots. I'm tired of going to the doctors and having blood drawn what feels like every week. I'm tired of dealing with the nurses at my doctors office making sure they get test results in on time to the clinic in Minnesotta. I'm tired of how tired the medications make me. Its hard for me to keep up with my house and my kids if I'm exhausted all the time. I feel like I've done all I can and I'm done for a while. I either can't do it again or I just need a nice long break. I have plans to take the kids to Disney World again for Fall Break in October, which is also the week of Nevaehs birthday. I have that to look forward to. Maybe after that I will feel better rested, will have gotton over the devestation of it all and will be ready for another round but until then I am going to enjoy the energy I have now and concentrate on other things I have going on, especially with my kids.

Thank you so much for all the support you all have showed me during this process. It makes my day knowing I have so many caring friends:)